DIGNITY on a boring night

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I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY PEOPLE SHARE SUCH A DISTORTED DEFINITION OF DIGNITY. 

It’s as if 99% of the time, we confuse dignity as one's ability to conform to social norms. (And here I am assuming part of the 1% who actually understands) My sentiments aren't rooted from any specific (or current) devastating experience, nor am I posting this to rationalize any questionable act of mine, of a skanky friend or maybe even Kim Kardashian. It's simply, one of those nights when your friends are enjoying Sinulog and you find yourself pathetic, grounded and alone with your laptop, contemplating about the little things that make up this doomed world we are forced to co-exist in. And besides, the concept of dignity just really fascinates me. Isn’t that what blogs are for in the first place?

Now before I drive into a further detour, let’s get back to topic:

Dignity? I used to think that this was our inherent worth, or perhaps the right to be respected? But it seems  that the concept is NOW way too tarnished by society, a society so condemning by nature that it has viciously and successfully appropriated "conformity to social norms and fear of stepping outside one's comfort zone" (or something like that) as a new meaning to the word

(which consequently reduces the definition of dignity as something that is extremely relative to context. Wasn’t dignity originally a universal concept? But the new relativity of dignity is an entirely different point that deserves an entire page to itself)

It just frustrates me, how people so easily throw around the word "dignity" as if they themselves have full grasp, mastery and embodiment of the concept. But nowadays, dignity seems to be worth just as much as a bottle of coke: tangible, alienable and so easily lost and consumed. (What a pathetic metaphor. Sorry but I'm enjoying some cocacola right now)

The moment you break the rules of society, it seems as if you have instantly reduced your worth to zero, losing your dignity before you even get the chance to realize what was "wrong" about what you did.

Of course, there now exists a certain set of rules that we must abide by in order to “keep your dignity.” And I’m sure you know exactly of these rules I’m referring to: Those norms that are meant to keep a certain social order; to maintain status quo, to keep those at the bottom right there, down where they belong and same goes for those above; political roles, social roles, gender roles, sexual roles, OR ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING THAT makes the game just as difficult for everyone else.

Contrary to what society dictates, you don't lose your dignity when you do something unorthodox, no matter how strange your act may be.

You don't lose your dignity when you go out of your way to send a text message to the guy you like.
You don't lose your dignity when you chase your ex who obviously couldn’t give any fuck, even if he prayed to the lord or some shamman king to help him give a little more fuck about you.
You don't lose your dignity when a nude photo of yours circulates around the Internet.
You don't lose your dignity if you got caught cheating in presidential elections (don’t get me wrong, I don’t like GMA either)

Yes, you may have successfully shattered your reputation into tiny little pieces of regret. Yes, you have broken the rules (whether legal, spoken or abstract rules) and yes may or may not deserve to go to jail.

You have lost the respect of people, but you haven't lost your dignity, you don't lose your dignity, ever, at all, no matter how crazily hard you try. 

The very moment you start losing respect for yourself will probably be the closest you can ever get to completely ridding yourself of dignity: The moment you stop respecting yourself, you are in no position to demand respect from others.
But you still have every right to be respected, don’t get me wrong.

Let's take the most generic example of what society dictates as a person with no dignity: Whores, porn stars and the sexually liberated.
She doesn't have to be a prostitute, but someone who takes pleasure in sexual activity with utter disregard for societal judgment. (Hey I actually did research to justify this claim! This really IS the primary thought that pops people’s minds when the absence of dignity is brought up) 
She chooses to sleep around. Is she guilty of harming anyone in the process of her tasks? (In fact, it seems as if the only harm she imposes upon herself is the danger of judgment coupled with the possible threats of STD’s, which is so totally NONE OF your business.)

If she is still able to live her life with a much greater sense of fulfillment than any of us, we have no right to impose the absence of her dignity. Call her a whore and warn your sons against her for all I care, just don’t go around telling the world that she has no dignity.

In fact, I have more respect for the whores and public enemies who are alleged of having lost their dignity, as compared those judgmental conformist abiders of social norms.


Say all you want, because Sasha Grey may actually be a happier person on a bad day, than you have ever been on the climax of the best day of your life. 

Reevaluate the reason behind your judgments. If you judge because you genuinely think it defies your personal integrity and principles, go and take the liberty to criticize. But if those integrity and principles of yours are based solely on the norms that are dictated by society and not anything that would personally disgust you had you not been nurtured by such a condescending society, I don't think that makes you a very happy person.

For as long as nothing (apart from society's approval) is taken away from you and insofar as you can still enjoy sweet slumber without guilt and self-disgust haunting you every night, you still have your dignity, in a shatterproof and life-lock case made with pure joy, esteem and respect.